First Day of Our Engagement.

Hello there bloggers, 

      This is my first blog that I finally came about to write. Today I thought it might be appropriate to talk about our first Engagement. By 'Our' I mean my Bubuh and I.  Well, lets start; we got engaged on August 4th or 2012. Yay!! ( Clapping my hands together like a little kid) a day after our third year of dating my Bubuh proposed to me in mid air, literally!!  I was shocked and didn't understand what was going on because I seriously didn't expect anything like this. I honestly thought we'd get married later on, like five years or so. The proposal was a surprise, sweet, fun and I was soooo happy he proposed.  I tell you this guy did good!! ;) 

   Any who i'm writing to let you know what we went through for the first day of our engagement. Let me just start out by saying once I got home I-was-overwhelmed. Personally I don't think anyone can be prepared to go through the first day of engagement. So here is a short list of the things we went through. Mostly me (My man was calm as ever).  Whether your family is European or not i'm sure this may have happened to you or may happen. So prepare yourself! :) ( Dun dun dunnnn) 


Telling your friends or the Facebook world about your engagement before your family: 
  
   Yes, we all want to take that one photo of the ring on your finger and shove it into everyone's faces. But this is something I regret. I don't regret telling folks about the engagement and how happy I was , I'm regretting not telling my family first and i'll tell you why; because my family was pissed! Little did I know that my family knew I was getting engaged, they just didn't know where and what time. So here I was keeping my distance from my parents and family to save the big surprise only to come home to my family NOT SUPRISED !! Don't get me wrong my family's happy for me, they just got mad that I didn't tell them first. This I also regret because family should always come first and they will always care more than the Facebook world.  This left me sort of sad. ( Not what I expected)  It went a little like this.  Me- " I'm engaged!" Mom, Dad- " We know" ( Wooo exciting, not! ) =( 

' When is the wedding day '?: 
   
     You WILL be asked this the first day of your engagement. If you are shaking you head and disagreeing with me well than good job. * High five* . I don't know how you do it. =P 
It's not bad to be asked when your wedding day is, just not the day of your engagement.  We had no idea when we wanted to get married and for a while we were considering to get married in several years so we just kept saying 'we don't know'.  The first thing my parent's asked me when I got home was this same exact question. I was like ' Who knows the first day of their engagement'?!  It was stressful because family kept asking and friends, coworkers and random people asked and still to this day ask.  We've now chosen our wedding date but when we hadn't had our date set I remember breaking down at times because I felt like my family kept pushing us to get married quicker.  It seemed all fun to be engaged but at the same time we were pushed to start making plans.  Now when I look back I feel like I wasn't in the right mindset yet about a wedding.  I just liked the sweet moment we were in and that was enough for me, for my family not so much.  


Everyone wanted to tell us how to plan our wedding: 

   Oh my goodness, this one was stressful to the MAX!  My family is very into everyone's business and what they do and how they go about doing it.  So here I am sitting at my parent's Sunday dinners being told what kind of tables we should have.  Ugh! To start I didn't like any suggestions they had, I didn't want round tables and I didn't want a fully covered wedding dress.  In fact,  I didn't want to hear another word about any wedding.  At this point I needed a mental break.  My family didn't understand that the things Bubuh and I wanted were not what they wanted so this made things difficult.  But it's our wedding and soon enough we all got used to this fact.  So don't be surprised if people tell you how to spend your money and where to spend it or even what kind of tables to get. Your fiancé is the one to speak with about planning. He helped me stay calm and collected every single time I felt weak. (Such a sweetheart : D)  

Church/ Family expectations: 

 This one might not apply to everyone but it's an important one for my Bubuh and I.  To start, my family wanted us to get married as soon as possible so that we wouldn't need to live in temptation. ( As if three years isn't enough of temptation).  The church has rules that a Women or a Man should marry into a Christian family, which is fine.  Everything was okay by us.  We understood that we had to hold ourselves until marriage.  But this is more about the way things were said and some what forced upon us, more so me because my family is more strict.  To explain,  every time we wanted to go and hangout over the weekend or have a road trip I wouldn't be allowed to go.  ( I am 20)  I would either find the right time to ask or not go at all.  This became frustrating because we are engaged to be married and here we are not being allowed to go anywhere overnight.  I understand that sleeping over isn't very lady like in my culture  but I still felt crappy because this made me feel like I was a little kid again.  I didn't feel 20 and engaged, I felt useless.  Every time I brought up the circumstance that Bubuh and I were engaged they told me that I should get married and then do WHATEVER  I want, but until I lived under their roof I had to live by their rules.  ( Ouch! I hated this! )  So we slowly  and carefully planned out times we could go travel and have a good reasons to do so.  It's hard sometimes but we respect our family's and love them.  The same time we had to tell ourselves and  our families that we are engaged at the end of the day and we will do what we have too.  It also became difficult for me to attend church with Bubuh at our American church, while at the same time my parent's  forcing me to go to their European church. So I go to our church one time and to theirs another time just to keep things calm on Sundays. 


   
     So these are the several things we went through during the first day and weeks of our engagement.  At times it was stressful and other times it's a whole lot of fun.  It was important to tell one another what we wanted out of all this. For me I told my mom that I wanted  to have a chill time whenever we talked about wedding planning and so far things have gone smoothly. ( Thanks to God, who of course watches over and helps keep our cool)  Being engaged will open your eyes up to a whole new way of life which you will experience at some point in your life.  At the same time you are still you, JUST ENGAGED. ( REMEMBER THAT) So don't worry relax and take a deep breath! Things will be okay when you take one step at a time.  Our engagement day was hectic with the whole family and just overly excited. That being said we need something to relax our bodies so we did a thing I now like to call a " MINI MOON". Which is simply a honeymoon for your engagement.  Nothing big, just peaceful and relaxing. We ended up spending our 'MINI MOON' by grabbing our bathing suits and towels and head to our local beach. We spent some $$ on chips and sunscreen ( because we burn =P,  well mostly I do. Teehee) and sunbathed out on the beach until dusk. So I had fun and I wouldn't change a thing because all this made it that much more special and exciting. I hope this informed you and hopefully you'll enjoy that MINI MOON soon! ;) 


   
                                                      * Peace * 
                                                   Nadika*Copika 


                                                   Keep blogging and be nice!